喂，那個愛我的人你出發了嗎？路途遙遠，求你別步行了，打車吧！

Hello, the one who loves me, have you set out? It's a long way to go. Don't walk and take a taxi!

誰給我的QQ餵了止咳糖漿，我感覺這個企鵝已經好久沒咳嗽了。

Who gave my QQ feed cough syrup, I feel thispenguin has not cough for a long time.

你知道爲什麼我這麼好看嗎？因爲我的爸爸媽媽，給了我一張胡說八道的嘴。

Do you know why I look so good? Because myparents gave me a mouth full of nonsense.

在這個世界上，總有很多事情無法解釋。比如有的人喫飯長智商，有的人卻只長脂肪。

In this world, there are always many things that cannot be explained.For example, some people have long IQ when eating, Some people only grow fat.

年輕的時候我以爲錢就是一切，現在老了才知道，確實如此。

When I was young, I thought money was everything. Now I know when I am old, it's true.

你永遠不知道那些看起來窮的人有多有錢，但我不一樣，我是表裏如一的窮。

You never know how rich those who look poor, but I'm different. I'm as poor as I can be.

每當男生說整理好了自己的房間時，標準通常指的是：從門到牀之間的路已經打通了。

When a boy says he has finished his room, the standard usually refers to: The road from the door to the bed is clear.

你們老說我閨蜜窮，但是我覺得看問題不能這麼片面，你不能因爲她窮，就忽略了她的醜！

You always say that my best friend is poor, but I don't think we can be so one-sided, because she is not only poor, but also ugly.

圖源來自網絡，侵權立刪！謝謝！