真挚的友谊来自源源不断的问候，大家早上好，祝大家永远单身。

Sincere friendship comes from constant greetings, Good morning, everyone. May you be single forever.

那些有对象就互删的人真的很搞笑，你单身我看不上，有对象了我还能拆散你？

Those people who delete each other when they have a partner are really funny. When you're single, I don't look up to you. If you have a partner, I can break you up?

只要我把自己吃得够圆，就没人能看扁我！

As long as I'm fat enough, no one can look down on me!

最近头有点痒，可能在长脑子。

Recently, my head is itchy. Maybe I'mgrowing a brain.

现在啥平台都在猜我喜欢，猜来猜去也没猜出来我喜欢啥，看不出来我喜欢免费的吗？

Now all platforms are guessing what I like, but they are failed, because I like things that are free.

打雷的时候，我害怕地抱住男朋友，紧紧地闭着眼睛，男朋友温柔地拍拍我的背说：别装！

When it thundered, I hugged my boyfriend and closed my eyes for fear, then my boyfriend gently patted me on the back and said: don't pretend!

温柔仅供参考，一切以生气的时间为准。

Gentleness is for reference only. Everything is subject to the time of anger

最近发现传统文化丢失非常严重，古代的女子个个能呤诗作对。现在的女子，只会作对。

I recently found that the loss of conventional culture is more than serious, The ladies in ancient times could write poems, however today's women can only fight against each other.

最近觉得自己真的老了，记性不好，有些东西记不起来放哪了，见人就想问：“我是不是给你脸了？”

I feel old recently, because I don't remember who I gave things to, when I meet someone, I want to ask: did I give you a face.

图源来自网络，侵权立删，谢谢！