天生我才必有用，一直不知怎么用。

I'm born to be useful. I don't know howto use it.

关于我为什么处不到对象 我就简单说六点：……

I'll just say six points about why I can't get my partner.

能不能转账给我买点草莓，下次还你脖子上。

Can you give me some money to buy some strawberries and I'll give it back to your neck next time.

你喜欢什么样的男人？我喜欢笑起来会发光的男人。你是说如来吗？

What kind of man do you like? I like men who smile and shine.Do you mean Tathagata?

我这么高冷的人，想让我低头，我告诉你，不可能！除非地下有钱。

I'm so cold, you want me to bow my head, I tell you it's impossible! Unless there's money underground.

暑假快结束了，是时候该收收心，准备下国庆小长假了。

Summer vacation is coming to an end. It's time to calm down and prepare for the National Day holiday.

人还是要多出去走走，不然根本不知道在家里玩手机有多舒服。

People need to go out for a walk, or they don't know how comfortable it is to play mobile phones at home.

知道我和唐僧的区别吗？唐僧取经我娶你。

Do you know the difference between me and Tang Seng? Tang Seng takes scriptures and I will marry you.

我一定要努力，让那些嘲笑我的人，都被我笑死。

I must try my best to make those who laugh at me laugh to death.

图源来自网络，侵权立删！谢谢！